energy

bouncer. one of those 'early' electronic games that friends brought to school in my new york days, the cool toys to have. boys got their name and black marks on the board because it was too big a temptation to try to sneak and play with before recess time. i did not like it, at least not that game. if you didn't catch whatever was bounced on a trampoline type thing, then it splatted and that wasn't nice. i didn't like pacman for a similar idea (who wants to be eaten up?) and still don't like to play computer games (shoot em up, destroy this, destroy that - not for me). i did however play bouncer some time or other and i did learn that keeping the energy of the 'game' under control/restrained helped it not 'fly' out of control. the other day Amelie and i were looking for elephants online and again there was a game where the elephant was jumping on the trampoline, doing flips and flying high, oh so high, too high to land safely...

when there were 6 kids running (& screaming) around my apartment a week ago Sabbath (okay, two were babies who weren't running or screaming), i saw energy. energy that was hard to restrain. forgetting the clean-up and dishes (so what if you are the hostess, others can do it - i have kind friends), it was time to find cool ocean stickers and spend some one-on-one time with the kids to bring calm to the chaos. (no pictures here to name names - they are sweet kids you know and they are a whole lot more obedient than my dog! - instead here is a picture of my Mom's wild kids in action in 1970 in Japan.)

living with a big family and watching my Mom with us and with all the other children she then (and still does) mothered gave my sisters and i the ability to rein in the energy without thinking about it. while my sisters have their kids and are terrific mothers of many - including the 'baby' Esmé who has enough energy for twins or more - people think they have earned their talents and are surprised when they see me (who is not a mother) have skills to 'mother' many. i think we learned it all while we were babies ourselves as my Mom was such a good teacher (and of course our oldest sister followed close behind in her skills when she because boss of 3 siblings at age 4).

well, looking at it another way, the skill could be just a survival tactic. there are those of us who get energy from being in the midst of people and those of us who get energy from being alone. i get energy not from being in the midst of many people (which i do love but everyone else's energy drives me crazy sooner or later), not from being alone (where my energy drives me crazy sooner than later), but from being gathered in groups of two or three (family, close friends - where i am most happy with or without energy even if everyone else knows i'm crazy).

Jesus promised that where two or three are gathered in His name, He will be in our midst. He also spent hours alone with His Father, hours in the midst of multitudes and hours with a few friends. He has energy, He has life and he wants to share it with us. It is not too much energy to make us fly out of control, it is the right amount that reins in our natural energies.

the past weeks were full. full of planning meetings, administrative meetings, interviews, debates, non-friendly and friendly meetings. sometimes (many times) it was overwhelming and i wanted to run and hide. i prayed, friends prayed and i clung to God - i know God is in control, things work out, i've been through these things - but emotions are still very hard to control no matter what we know sometimes. this morning when i awoke, i thought of a problem and instead of ranting and raving (in my mind) about the cause of it and the incompetence and.... my mind was full of love. love for that persons who caused it. thinking on to other problems it was the same. and coming to the office it stayed. instead of barely restraining my frustration, that love made it easy to work together for solutions.

ah, there are many more solutions to find. many more obstacles and challenges to face. but i know what i need - Christ's gift - the energy of love. His energy that overcomes, reins, focuses and channels so that our lives can show His love to others.